Beach

Beach
Los Angeles, CA 2015

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

My Life Without Pictures

I am not one who has a camera glued to her hand. There have been many happy, fun, "momentous" occasions in which the camera has been forgotten. Generally, I am not too saddened by these times because I do feel that there is something missed in the moment when you are witnessing it through a 2 inch screen on the back of a metal box. That being said, I love pictures... actual pictures that come in envelopes and you put in frames or scrapbooks or shoe boxes to save for later. Our family lives so far away, that I feel it is important to capture as many moments of our children's lives as possible. I hope that through the photos that I post on this blog or send through the mail that grandparents, aunts, uncles, special friends will feel like they are able to watch our children grow up and share in that special journey. Sadly, we have now been without a camera for weeks that are turning into months.
At first, I didn't really notice or care that we didn't have a camera. I missed the photos from our Memorial Day visit to Virginia, but felt better knowing that others had taken pictures. Summer has started off slowly, so there haven't been an abundance of photo opportunities, plus the kids got their summer portraits done so we had photos to send to family. However, in the last few weeks I've felt some pangs of sadness at the small moments that I would have liked to share, but have missed.
At VBS last week, the roar of the kids was amazing. I would have taken a small video of the 200+ crowd singing, dancing and cheering, especially Degen dancing and clapping to the music. And when Kyrie went on-stage at the VBS carnival and sang & danced with the other kids, I wish I could have gotten video of her "performance."
Last night, Kyrie road her big girl bike all the way to the neighborhood park. It was the first time she'd ridden anywhere other than our driveway. Within minutes of us setting off on our trip (me jogging alongside her), she looked back at me, and I wish I could have captured that moment. She was wearing a long, turquoise tank top and her blonde hair spiraled down her back from underneath her purple, flowered helmet. When she looked over her shoulder at me, she had this amazing look of pride & happiness with just a tinge of surprise. It was amazing! I also would have wanted the picture of her riding "far" ahead of me, so independent and confident.
Degen's babbling is just now barely starting to become words. (I'm not worried, Kyrie was a "late" talker, too.) He CAN say "Daddy" & "Momma," though he rarely does. He knows a handful of signs, but just grins when you ask him to use one. When the moment is right, you might get a "whee" or an "uh-oh," if  you're lucky. That's why I was so surprised  last week when I heard him singing, "ash-eh, ash-eh" and turning around. He'd picked up the concept of "Ring Around the Rosie" from Kyrie, and it had made an impression. This boy loves music, so I guess I shouldn't be too surprised that he started singing before talking. In the past week, we've sang "Ring Around..." more times than I can count prompted by little Degen's "ash-eh, ash-eh." I would make a short video of that to share with you.
The other night, I peeked in Kyrie's room after we put her to bed and our cat, Brutus was curled up on the pillow next to her. It was very sweet, and I wish I had a picture of it even though it probably would have been difficult to make out the scene in the room's low light.
Degen's hair is getting long. It curls a lot in the back, so you can't really tell how long it is, and I don't have the heart to get it cut. The past few nights after bath, the top has begun to curl back like a Kewpie doll's hair. It is absolutely adorable. I would like a picture of that too-cute curl on the top of his head!
The splashing in the pool, catching fireflies with Daddy, Degen in his new Cozy Coupe.... I need a camera because as much as I want my memory & heart to hold all these pictures as clearly as I do now, I know that they will get jumbled and lost in the weeks, months and years that fly past. 
Independence Day is almost here, and I'm not sure if we'll have a camera by then or not, but I hope so because I know that even though we don't have any plans, we do have kids and they're gonna do something too cute to miss. And you'll miss it, and someday I'll miss it, too.

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